Cease to persuade , my loving Proteus :
Home-keeping youth have ever homely wits .
Were't not affection chains thy tender days 
To the sweet glances of thy honour'd love ,
I rather would entreat thy company 
To see the wonders of the world abroad 
Than , living dully sluggardiz'd at home ,
Wear out thy youth with shapeless idleness .
But since thou lov'st , love still , and thrive therein ,
Even as I would when I to love begin .

Wilt thou be gone ? Sweet Valentine , adieu !
Think on thy Proteus , when thou haply seest 
Some rare note-worthy object in thy travel :
Wish me partaker in thy happiness 
When thou dost meet good hap ; and in thy danger ,
If ever danger do environ thee ,
Commend thy grievance to my holy prayers ,
For I will be thy beadsman , Valentine .

And on a love-book pray for my success ?

Upon some book I love I'll pray for thee .

That's on some shallow story of deep love ,
How young Leander cross'd the Hellespont .

That's a deep story of a deeper love ;
For he was more than over shoes in love .

'Tis true ; for you are over boots in love ,
And yet you never swum the Hellespont .

Over the boots ? nay , give me not the boots .

No , I will not , for it boots thee not .

What ?

To be in love , where scorn is bought with groans ;
Coy looks with heart-sore sighs ; one fading moment's mirth 
With twenty watchful , weary , tedious nights :
If haply won , perhaps a hapless gain ;
If lost , why then a grievous labour won :
However , but a folly bought with wit ,
Or else a wit by folly vanquished .

So , by your circumstance , you call me fool .

So , by your circumstance , I fear you'll prove .

'Tis love you cavil at : I am not Love .

Love is your master , for he masters you ;
And he that is so yoked by a fool ,
Methinks , should not be chronicled for wise .

Yet writers say , as in the sweetest bud 
The eating canker dwells , so eating love 
Inhabits in the finest wits of all .

And writers say , as the most forward bud 
Is eaten by the canker ere it blow ,
Even so by love the young and tender wit 
Is turned to folly ; blasting in the bud ,
Losing his verdure even in the prime ,
And all the fair effects of future hopes .
But wherefore waste I time to counsel thee 
That art a votary to fond desire ?
Once more adieu ! my father at the road 
Expects my coming , there to see me shipp'd .

And thither will I bring thee , Valentine .

Sweet Proteus , no ; now let us take our leave .
To Milan let me hear from thee by letters 
Of thy success in love , and what news else 
Betideth here in absence of thy friend ;
And I likewise will visit thee with mine .

All happiness bechance to thee in Milan !

As much to you at home ! and so , farewell .


He after honour hunts , I after love :
He leaves his friends to dignify them more ;
I leave myself , my friends and all , for love .
Thou , Julia , thou hast metamorphos'd me ;
Made me neglect my studies , lose my time ,
War with good counsel , set the world at nought ;
Made wit with musing weak , heart sick with thought .


Sir Proteus , save you ! Saw you my master ?

But now he parted hence , to embark for Milan .

Twenty to one , then , he is shipp'd already ,
And I have play'd the sheep , in losing him .

Indeed , a sheep doth very often stray ,
An if the shepherd be a while away .

You conclude that my master is a shepherd , then , and I a sheep ?

I do .

Why then my horns are his horns , whether I wake or sleep .

A silly answer , and fitting well a sheep .

This proves me still a sheep .

True , and thy master a shepherd .

Nay , that I can deny by a circumstance .

It shall go hard but I'll prove it by another .

The shepherd seeks the sheep , and not the sheep the shepherd ; but I seek my master , and my master seeks not me : therefore I am no sheep .

The sheep for fodder follow the shepherd , the shepherd for food follows not the sheep ; thou for wages followest thy master , thy master for wages follows not thee : therefore thou art a sheep .

Such another proof will make me cry 'baa .' 

But , dost thou hear ? gavest thou my letter to Julia ?

Ay , sir : I , a lost mutton , gave your letter to her , a laced mutton ; and she , a laced mutton , gave me , a lost mutton , nothing for my labour .

Here's too small a pasture for such store of muttons .

If the ground be overcharged , you were best stick her .

Nay , in that you are astray ; 'twere best pound you .

Nay , sir , less than a pound shall serve me for carrying your letter .

You mistake : I mean the pound ,a pinfold .

From a pound to a pin ? fold it over and over ,
'Tis threefold too little for carrying a letter to your lover .

But what said she ?

Did she nod ?

Ay .

Nod , ay ? why , that's noddy .

You mistook , sir : I say she did nod ; and you ask me if she did nod ; and I say , Ay .

And that set together is noddy .

Now you have taken the pains to set it together , take it for your pains .

No , no ; you shall have it for bearing the letter .

Well , I perceive I must be fain to bear with you .

Why , sir , how do you bear with me ?

Marry , sir , the letter very orderly ; having nothing but the word 'noddy' for my pains .

Beshrew me , but you have a quick wit .

And yet it cannot overtake your slow purse .

Come , come ; open the matter in brief : what said she ?

Open your purse , that the money and the matter may be both at once delivered .

Well , sir , here is for your pains 

What said she ?

Truly , sir , I think you'll hardly win her .

Why ? couldst thou perceive so much from her ?

Sir , I could perceive nothing at all from her ; no , not so much as a ducat for delivering your letter . And being so hard to me that brought your mind , I fear she'll prove as hard to you in telling your mind . Give her no token but stones , for she's as hard as steel .

What ! said she nothing ?

No , not so much as 'Take this for thy pains .' To testify your bounty , I thank you , you have testerned me ; in requital whereof , henceforth carry your letters yourself . And so , sir , I'll commend you to my master .

Go , go , be gone , to save your ship from wrack ;
Which cannot perish , having thee aboard ,
Being destin'd to a drier death on shore .

I must go send some better messenger :
I fear my Julia would not deign my lines ,
Receiving them from such a worthless post .


But say , Lucetta , now we are alone ,
Wouldst thou then counsel me to fall in love ?

Ay , madam , so you stumble not unheedfully .

Of all the fair resort of gentlemen 
That every day with parle encounter me ,
In thy opinion which is worthiest love ?

Please you repeat their names , I'll show my mind 
According to my shallow simple skill .

What think'st thou of the fair Sir Eglamour ?

As of a knight well-spoken , neat and fine ;
But , were I you , he never should be mine .

What think'st thou of the rich Mercatio ?

Well of his wealth ; but of himself , so so .

What think'st thou of the gentle Proteus ?

Lord , Lord ! to see what folly reigns in us !

How now ! what means this passion at his name ?

Pardon , dear madam ; 'tis a passing shame 
That I , unworthy body as I am ,
Should censure thus on lovely gentlemen .

Why not on Proteus , as of all the rest ?

Then thus ,of many good I think him best .

Your reason ?

I have no other but a woman's reason :
I think him so because I think him so .

And wouldst thou have me cast my love on him ?

Ay , if you thought your love not cast away .

Why , he , of all the rest hath never mov'd me .

Yet he of all the rest , I think , best loves ye .

His little speaking shows his love but small .

Fire that's closest kept burns most of all .

They do not love that do not show their love .

O ! they love least that let men know their love .

I would I knew his mind .

Peruse this paper , madam .


'To Julia .' Say from whom ?

That the contents will show .

Say , say , who gave it thee ?

Sir Valentine's page , and sent , I think , from Proteus .
He would have given it you , but I , being in the way ,
Did in your name receive it ; pardon the fault , I pray .

Now , by my modesty , a goodly broker !
Dare you presume to harbour wanton lines ?
To whisper and conspire against my youth ?
Now , trust me , 'tis an office of great worth 
And you an officer fit for the place .
There , take the paper : see it be return'd ;
Or else return no more into my sight .

To plead for love deserves more fee than hate .

Will ye be gone ?

That you may ruminate .


And yet I would I had o'erlook'd the letter .
It were a shame to call her back again 
And pray her to a fault for which I chid her .
What fool is she , that knows I am a maid ,
And would not force the letter to my view !
Since maids , in modesty , say 'No' to that 
Which they would have the profferer construe 'Ay .' 
Fie , fie ! how wayward is this foolish love 
That , like a testy babe , will scratch the nurse 
And presently all humbled kiss the rod !
How churlishly I child Lucetta hence ,
When willingly I would have had her here :
How angerly I taught my brow to frown ,
When inward joy enforc'd my heart to smile .
My penance is , to call Lucetta back 
And ask remission for my folly past .
What ho ! Lucetta !


What would your ladyship ?

Is it near dinner-time ?

I would it were ;
That you might kill your stomach on your meat 
And not upon your maid .

What is't that you took up so gingerly ?

Nothing .

Why didst thou stoop , then ?

To take a paper up 
That I let fall .

And is that paper nothing ?

Nothing concerning me .

Then let it lie for those that it concerns .

Madam , it will not lie where it concerns ,
Unless it have a false interpreter .

Some love of yours hath writ to you in rime .

That I might sing it , madam , to a tune :
Give me a note : your ladyship can set .

As little by such toys as may be possible ;
Best sing it to the tune of 'Light o' Love .' 

It is too heavy for so light a tune .

Heavy ! belike it hath some burden , then ?

Ay ; and melodious were it , would you sing it .

And why not you ?

I cannot reach so high .

Let's see your song .

How now , minion !

Keep tune there still , so you will sing it out :
And yet methinks , I do not like this tune .

You do not ?

No , madam ; it is too sharp .

You , minion , are too saucy .

Nay , now you are too flat 
And mar the concord with too harsh a descant :
There wanteth but a mean to fill your song .

The mean is drown'd with your unruly bass .

Indeed , I bid the base for Proteus .

This babble shall not henceforth trouble me .
Here is a coil with protestation !

Go , get you gone , and let the papers lie :
You would be fingering them , to anger me .

She makes it strange ; but she would be best pleas'd 
To be so anger'd with another letter .


Nay , would I were so anger'd with the same !
O hateful hands , to tear such loving words !
Injurious wasps , to feed on such sweet honey 
And kill the bees that yield it with your stings !
I'll kiss each several paper for amends .
Look , here is writ 'kind Julia :' unkind Julia !
As in revenge of thy ingratitude ,
I throw thy name against the bruising stones ,
Trampling contemptuously on thy disdain .
And here is writ 'love-wounded Proteus :' 
Poor wounded name ! my bosom , as a bed 
Shall lodge thee till thy wound be throughly heal'd ;
And thus I search it with a sovereign kiss .
But twice or thrice was 'Proteus' written down :
Be calm , good wind , blow not a word away 
Till I have found each letter in the letter ,
Except mine own name ; that some whirlwind bear 
Unto a ragged , fearful hanging rock ,
And throw it thence into the raging sea !
Lo ! here in one line is his name twice writ ,
'Poor forlorn Proteus , passionate Proteus ,
To the sweet Julia' :that I'll tear away ;
And yet I will not , sith so prettily 
He couples it to his complaining names :
Thus will I fold them one upon another :
Now kiss , embrace , contend , do what you will .


Madam ,
Dinner is ready , and your father stays .

Well , let us go .

What ! shall these papers he like tell-tales here ?

If you respect them , best to take them up .

Nay , I was taken up for laying them down ;
Yet here they shall not lie , for catching cold .

I see you have a month's mind to them .

Ay , madam , you may say what sights you see ;
I see things too , although you judge I wink .

Come , come ; will't please you go ?


Tell me , Panthino , what sad talk was that 
Wherewith my brother held you in the cloister ?

'Twas of his nephew Proteus , your son .

Why , what of him ?

He wonder'd that your lordship 
Would suffer him to spend his youth at home ,
While other men , of slender reputation ,
Put forth their sons to seek preferment out :
Some to the wars , to try their fortune there ;
Some to discover islands far away ;
Some to the studious universities .
For any or for all these exercises 
He said that Proteus your son was meet ,
And did request me to importune you 
To let him spend his time no more at home ,
Which would be great impeachment to his age ,
In having known to travel in his youth .

Nor need'st thou much importune me to that 
Whereon this month I have been hammering .
I have consider'd well his loss of time ,
And how he cannot be a perfect man ,
Not being tried and tutor'd in the world :
Experience is by industry achiev'd 
And perfected by the swift course of time .
Then tell me , whither were I best to send him ?

I think your lordship is not ignorant 
How his companion , youthful Valentine ,
Attends the emperor in his royal court .

I know it well .

'Twere good , I think , your lordship sent him thither :
There shall be practise tilts and tournaments ,
Hear sweet discourse , converse with noblemen ,
And be in eye of every exercise 
Worthy his youth and nobleness of birth .

I like thy counsel , well hast thou advis'd :
And that thou mayst perceive how well I like it 
The execution of it shall make known .
Even with the speediest expedition 
I will dispatch him to the emperor's court .

To-morrow , may it please you , Don Alphonso 
With other gentlemen of good esteem ,
Are journeying to salute the emperor 
And to commend their service to his will .

Good company ; with them shall Proteus go :
And in good time :now will we break with him .


Sweet love ! sweet lines ! sweet life !
Here is her hand , the agent of her heart ;
Here is her oath for love , her honour's pawn .
O ! that our fathers would applaud our loves ,
To seal our happiness with their consents !
O heavenly Julia !

How now ! what letter are you reading there ?

May't please your lordship , 'tis a word or two 
Of commendations sent from Valentine ,
Deliver'd by a friend that came from him .

Lend me the letter ; let me see what news .

There is no news , my lord ; but that he writes 
How happily he lives , how well belov'd 
And daily graced by the emperor ;
Wishing me with him , partner of his fortune .

And how stand you affected to his wish ?

As one relying on your lordship's will 
And not depending on his friendly wish .

My will is something sorted with his wish .
Muse not that I thus suddenly proceed ;
For what I will , I will , and there an end .
I am resolv'd that thou shalt spend some time 
With Valentinus in the emperor's court :
What maintenance he from his friends receives ,
Like exhibition thou shalt have from me .
To-morrow be in readiness to go :
Excuse it not , for I am peremptory .

My lord , I cannot be so soon provided :
Please you , deliberate a day or two .

Look , what thou want'st shall be sent after thee :
No more of stay ; to-morrow thou must go .
Come on , Panthino : you shall be employ'd 
To hasten on his expedition .


Thus have I shunn'd the fire for fear of burning ,
And drench'd me in the sea , where I am drown'd .
I fear'd to show my father Julia's letter ,
Lest he should take exceptions to my love ;
And with the vantage of mine own excuse 
Hath he excepted most against my love .
O ! how this spring of love resembleth 
The uncertain glory of an April day ,
Which now shows all the beauty of the sun ,
And by and by a cloud takes all away !


Sir Proteus , your father calls for you :
He is in haste ; therefore , I pray you , go .

Why , this it is : my heart accords thereto ,
And yet a thousand times it answers , 'no .' 

Sir , your glove .


Not mine ; my gloves are on .

Why , then this may be yours , for this is but one .

Ha ! let me see : ay , give it me , it's mine ;
Sweet ornament that decks a thing divine !
Ah Silvia ! Silvia !

Madam Silvia ! Madam Silvia !

How now , sirrah ?

She is not within hearing , sir .

Why , sir , who bade you call her ?

Your worship , sir ; or else I mistook .

Well , you'll still be too forward .

And yet I was last chidden for being too slow .

Go to , sir . Tell me , do you know Madam Silvia ?

She that your worship loves ?

Why , how know you that I am in love ?

Marry , by these special marks : first , you have learned , like Sir Proteus , to wreathe your arms , like a malecontent ; to relish a love-song , like a robin-redbreast ; to walk alone , like one that had the pestilence ; to sigh , like a schoolboy that had lost his A B C ; to weep , like a young wench that had buried her grandam ; to fast , like one that takes diet ; to watch , like one that fears robbing ; to speak puling , like a beggar at Hallowmas . You were wont , when you laughed , to crow like a cock ; when you walked , to walk like one of the lions ; when you fasted , it was presently after dinner ; when you looked sadly , it was for want of money : and now you are metamorphosed with a mistress , that , when I look on you , I can hardly think you my master .

Are all these things perceived in me ?

They are all perceived without ye .

Without me ? they cannot .

Without you ? nay , that's certain ; for , without you were so simple , none else would : but you are so without these follies , that these follies are within you and shine through you like the water in an urinal , that not an eye that sees you but is a physician to comment on your malady .

But tell me , dost thou know my lady Silvia ?

She that you gaze on so as she sits at supper ?

Hast thou observed that ? even she , I mean .

Why , sir , I know her not .

Dost thou know her by my gazing on her , and yet knowest her not ?

Is she not hard-favoured , sir ?

Not so fair , boy , as well-favoured .

Sir , I know that well enough .

What dost thou know ?

That she is not so fair , as , of you , well-favoured .

I mean that her beauty is exquisite , but her favour infinite .

That's because the one is painted and the other out of all count .

How painted ? and how out of count ?

Marry , sir , so painted to make her fair , that no man counts of her beauty .

How esteemest thou me ? I account of her beauty .

You never saw her since she was deformed .

How long hath she been deformed ?

Ever since you loved her .

I have loved her ever since I saw her , and still I see her beautiful .

If you love her you cannot see her .

Why ?

Because Love is blind . O ! that you had mine eyes ; or your own eyes had the lights they were wont to have when you chid at Sir Proteus for going ungartered !

What should I see then ?

Your own present folly and her passing deformity : for he , being in love , could not see to garter his hose ; and you , being in love , cannot see to put on your hose .

Belike , boy , then , you are in love ; for last morning you could not see to wipe my shoes .

True , sir ; I was in love with my bed . I thank you , you swinged me for my love , which makes me the bolder to chide you for yours .

In conclusion , I stand affected to her .

I would you were set , so your affection would cease .

Last night she enjoined me to write some lines to one she loves .

And have you ?

I have .

Are they not lamely writ ?

No , boy , but as well as I can do them .
Peace ! here she comes .


O excellent motion ! O exceeding puppet ! now will he interpret to her .

Madam and mistress , a thousand good morrows .

O ! give ye good even : here's a million of manners .

Sir Valentine and servant , to you two thousand .

He should give her interest , and she gives it him .

As you enjoin'd me , I have writ your letter 
Unto the secret nameless friend of yours ;
Which I was much unwilling to proceed in 
But for my duty to your ladyship .


I thank you , gentle servant . 'Tis very clerkly done .

Now , trust me , madam , it came hardly off ;
For , being ignorant to whom it goes 
I writ at random , very doubtfully .

Perchance you think too much of so much pains ?

No , madam ; so it stead you , I will write ,
Please you command , a thousand times as much .
And yet 

A pretty period ! Well , I guess the sequel ;
And yet I will not name it ; and yet I care not ;
And yet take this again ; and yet I thank you ,
Meaning henceforth to trouble you no more .

And yet you will ; and yet another yet .

What means your ladyship ? do you not like it ?

Yes , yes : the lines are very quaintly writ ,
But since unwillingly , take them again :
Nay , take them .


Madam , they are for you .

Ay , ay ; you writ them , sir , at my request ,
But I will none of them ; they are for you .
I would have had them writ more movingly .

Please you , I'll write your ladyship another .

And when it's writ , for my sake read it over :
And if it please you , so ; if not , why , so .

If it please me , madam , what then ?

Why , if it please you , take it for your labour :
And so , good morrow , servant .


O jest unseen , inscrutable , invisible ,
As a nose on a man's face , or a weathercock on a steeple !
My master sues to her , and she hath taught her suitor ,
He being her pupil , to become her tutor .
O excellent device ! was there ever heard a better ,
That my master , being scribe , to himself should write the letter ?

How now , sir ! what are you reasoning with yourself ?

Nay , I was riming : 'tis you that have the reason .

To do what ?

To be a spokesman from Madam Silvia .

To whom ?

To yourself . Why , she wooes you by a figure .

What figure ?

By a letter , I should say .

Why , she hath not writ to me ?

What need she , when she hath made you write to yourself ? Why , do you not perceive the jest ?

No , believe me .

No believing you , indeed , sir . But did you perceive her earnest ?

She gave me none , except an angry word .

Why , she hath given you a letter .

That's the letter I writ to her friend .

And that letter hath she delivered , and there an end .

I would it were no worse .

I'll warrant you , 'tis as well :
'For often have you writ to her , and she , in modesty ,
Or else for want of idle time , could not again reply ;
Or fearing else some messenger that might her mind discover ,
Herself hath taught her love himself to write unto her lover .' 
All this I speak in print , for in print I found it .
Why muse you , sir ? 'tis dinner-time .

I have dined .

Ay , but hearken , sir : though the chameleon Love can feed on the air , I am one that am nourished by my victuals and would fain have meat . O ! be not like your mistress : be moved , be moved .


Have patience , gentle Julia .

I must , where is no remedy .

When possibly I can , I will return .

If you turn not , you will return the sooner .
Keep this remembrance for thy Julia's sake .


Why , then , we'll make exchange : here , take you this .


And seal the bargain with a holy kiss .

Here is my hand for my true constancy ;
And when that hour o'erslips me in the day 
Wherein I sigh not , Julia , for thy sake ,
The next ensuing hour some foul mischance 
Torment me for my love's forgetfulness !
My father stays my coming ; answer not .
The tide is now : nay , not thy tide of tears ;
That tide will stay me longer than I should .
Julia , farewell .

What ! gone without a word ?
Ay , so true love should do : it cannot speak ;
For truth hath better deeds than words to grace it .


Sir Proteus , you are stay'd for .

Go ; I come , I come .
Alas ! this parting strikes poor lovers dumb .


Nay , 'twill be this hour ere I have done weeping : all the kind of the Launces have this very fault . I have received my proportion , like the prodigious son , and am going with Sir Proteus to the imperial's court . I think Crab my dog be the sourest-natured dog that lives : my mother weeping , my father wailing , my sister crying , our maid howling , our cat wringing her hands , and all our house in a great perplexity , yet did not this cruel-hearted cur shed one tear . He is a stone , a very pebble stone , and has no more pity in him than a dog ; a Jew would have wept to have seen our parting : why , my grandam , having no eyes , look you , wept herself blind at my parting . Nay , I'll show you the manner of it . This shoe is my father ; no , this left shoe is my father : no , no , this left shoe is my mother ; nay , that cannot be so neither :yes , it is so ; it is so ; it hath the worser sole . This shoe , with the hole in , is my mother , and this my father . A vengeance on't ! there 'tis : now , sir , this staff is my sister ; for , look you , she is as white as a lily and as small as a wand : this hat is Nan , our maid : I am the dog ; no , the dog is himself , and I am the dog ,O ! the dog is me , and I am myself : ay , so , so . Now come I to my father ; 'Father , your blessing ;' now should not the shoe speak a word for weeping : now should I kiss my father ; well , he weeps on . Now come I to my mother ;O , that she could speak now like a wood woman ! Well , I kiss her ; why , there 'tis ; here's my mother's breath up and down . Now come I to my sister ; mark the moan she makes : Now the dog all this while sheds not a tear nor speaks a word ; but see how I lay the dust with my tears .


Launce , away , away , aboard ! thy master is shipped , and thou art to post after with oars . What's the matter ? why weepest thou , man ? Away , ass ! you'll lose the tide if you tarry any longer .

It is no matter if the tied were lost ; for it is the unkindest tied that ever any man tied .

What's the unkindest tide ?

Why , he that's tied here , Crab , my dog .

Tut , man , I mean thou'lt lose the flood ; and , in losing the flood , lose thy voyage , and , in losing thy voyage , lose thy master ; and , in losing thy master , lose thy service ; and , in losing thy service ,Why dost thou stop my mouth ?

For fear thou shouldst lose thy tongue .

Where should I lose my tongue ?

In thy tale .

In thy tail !

Lose the tide , and the voyage , and the master , and the service , and the tied ! Why , man , if the river were dry , I am able to fill it with my tears ; if the wind were down , I could drive the boat with my sighs .

Come , come away , man ; I was sent to call thee .

Sir , call me what thou darest .

Wilt thou go ?

Well , I will go .


Servant !

Mistress ?

Master , Sir Thurio frowns on you .

Ay , boy , it's for love .

Not of you .

Of my mistress , then .

'Twere good you knock'd him .

Servant , you are sad .

Indeed , madam , I seem so .

Seem you that you are not ?

Haply I do .

So do counterfeits .

So do you .

What seem I that I am not ?

Wise .

What instance of the contrary ?

Your folly .

And how quote you my folly ?

I quote it in your jerkin .

My jerkin is a doublet .

Well , then , I'll double your folly .

How ?

What , angry , Sir Thurio ! do you change colour ?

Give him leave , madam ; he is a kind of chameleon .

That hath more mind to feed on your blood than live in your air .

You have said , sir .

Ay , sir , and done too , for this time .

I know it well , sir : you always end ere you begin .

A fine volley of words , gentlemen , and quickly shot off .

'Tis indeed , madam ; we thank the giver .

Who is that , servant ?

Yourself , sweet lady ; for you gave the fire . Sir Thurio borrows his wit from your ladyship's looks , and spends what he borrows kindly in your company .

Sir , if you spend word for word with me , I shall make your wit bankrupt .

I know it well , sir : you have an exchequer of words , and , I think , no other treasure to give your followers ; for it appears by their bare liveries that they live by your bare words .

No more , gentlemen , no more . Here comes my father .


Now , daughter Silvia , you are hard beset .
Sir Valentine , your father's in good health :
What say you to a letter from your friends 
Of much good news ?

My lord , I will be thankful 
To any happy messenger from thence .

Know ye Don Antonio , your countryman ?

Ay , my good lord ; I know the gentleman 
To be of worth and worthy estimation ,
And not without desert so well reputed .

Hath he not a son ?

Ay , my good lord ; a son that well deserves 
The honour and regard of such a father .

You know him well ?

I know him as myself ; for from our infancy 
We have convers'd and spent our hours together :
And though myself have been an idle truant ,
Omitting the sweet benefit of time 
To clothe mine age with angel-like perfection ,
Yet hath Sir Proteus ,for that's his name ,
Made use and fair advantage of his days :
His years but young , but his experience old ;
His head unmellow'd , but his judgment ripe ;
And , in a word ,for far behind his worth 
Come all the praises that I now bestow ,
He is complete in feature and in mind 
With all good grace to grace a gentleman .

Beshrew me , sir , but if he make this good ,
He is as worthy for an empress' love 
As meet to be an emperor's counsellor .
Well , sir , this gentleman is come to me 
With commendation from great potentates ;
And here he means to spend his time awhile :
I think , 'tis no unwelcome news to you .

Should I have wish'd a thing , it had been he .

Welcome him then according to his worth .
Silvia , I speak to you ; and you , Sir Thurio :
For Valentine , I need not cite him to it .
I'll send him hither to you presently .


This is the gentleman I told your ladyship 
Had come along with me , but that his mistress 
Did hold his eyes lock'd in her crystal looks .

Belike that now she hath enfranchis'd them 
Upon some other pawn for fealty .

Nay , sure , I think she holds them prisoners still .

Nay , then he should be blind ; and , being blind ,
How could he see his way to seek out you ?

Why , lady , Love hath twenty pairs of eyes .

They say that Love hath not an eye at all .

To see such lovers , Thurio , as yourself :
Upon a homely object Love can wink .

Have done , have done . Here comes the gentleman .


Welcome , dear Proteus ! Mistress , I beseech you ,
Confirm his welcome with some special favour .

His worth is warrant for his welcome hither ,
If this be he you oft have wish'd to hear from .

Mistress , it is : sweet lady , entertain him 
To be my fellow-servant to your ladyship .

Too low a mistress for so high a servant .

Not so , sweet lady ; but too mean a servant 
To have a look of such a worthy mistress .

Leave off discourse of disability :
Sweet lady , entertain him for your servant .

My duty will I boast of , nothing else .

And duty never yet did want his meed .
Servant , you are welcome to a worthless mistress .

I'll die on him that says so but yourself .

That you are welcome ?

That you are worthless .


Madam , my lord your father would speak with you .

I wait upon his pleasure .

Come , Sir Thurio ,
Go with me . Once more , new servant , welcome :
I'll leave you to confer of home-affairs ;
When you have done , we look to hear from you .

We'll both attend upon your ladyship .


Now , tell me , how do all from whence you came ?

Your friends are well and have them much commended .

And how do yours ?

I left them all in health .

How does your lady and how thrives your love ?

My tales of love were wont to weary you ;
I know you joy not in a love-discourse .

Ay , Proteus , but that life is alter'd now :
I have done penance for contemning love ;
Whose high imperious thoughts have punish'd me 
With bitter fasts , with penitential groans ,
With nightly tears and daily heart-sore sighs ;
For , in revenge of my contempt of love ,
Love hath chas'd sleep from my enthralled eyes ,
And made them watchers of mine own heart's sorrow .
O , gentle Proteus ! Love's a mighty lord ,
And hath so humbled me as I confess ,
There is no woe to his correction ,
Nor to his service no such joy on earth .
Now no discourse , except it be of love ;
Now can I break my fast , dine , sup and sleep ,
Upon the very naked name of love .

Enough ; I read your fortune in your eye .
Was this the idol that you worship so ?

Even she ; and is she not a heavenly saint ?

No ; but she is an earthly paragon .

Call her divine .

I will not flatter her .

O ! flatter me , for love delights in praises .

When I was sick you gave me bitter pills ,
And I must minister the like to you .

Then speak the truth by her ; if not divine ,
Yet let her be a principality ,
Sovereign to all the creatures on the earth .

Except my mistress .

Sweet , except not any ,
Except thou wilt except against my love .

Have I not reason to prefer mine own ?

And I will help thee to prefer her too :
She shall be dignified with this high honour ,
To bear my lady's train , lest the base earth 
Should from her vesture chance to steal a kiss ,
And , of so great a favour growing proud ,
Disdain to root the summer-swelling flower ,
And make rough winter everlastingly .

Why , Valentine , what braggardism is this ?

Pardon me , Proteus : all I can is nothing 
To her whose worth makes other worthies nothing .
She is alone .

Then , let her alone .

Not for the world : why , man , she is mine own ,
And I as rich in having such a jewel 
As twenty seas , if all their sand were pearl ,
The water nectar , and the rocks pure gold .
Forgive me that I do not dream on thee ,
Because thou see'st me dote upon my love .
My foolish rival , that her father likes 
Only for his possessions are so huge ,
Is gone with her along , and I must after ,
For love , thou know'st , is full of jealousy .

But she loves you ?

Ay , and we are betroth'd : nay , more , our marriage-hour ,
With all the cunning manner of our flight ,
Determin'd of : how I must climb her window ,
The ladder made of cords , and all the means 
Plotted and 'greed on for my happiness .
Good Proteus , go with me to my chamber ,
In these affairs to aid me with thy counsel .

Go on before , I shall inquire you forth :
I must unto the road , to disembark 
Some necessaries that I needs must use ,
And then I'll presently attend you .

Will you make haste ?

I will .

Even as one heat another heat expels ,
Or as one nail by strength drives out another ,
So the remembrance of my former love 
Is by a newer object quite forgotten .
Is it mine eye , or Valentinus' praise ,
Her true perfection , or my false transgression ,
That makes me reasonless to reason thus ?
She's fair ; and so is Julia that I love ,
That I did love , for now my love is thaw'd ,
Which , like a waxen image 'gainst a fire ,
Bears no impression of the thing it was .
Methinks my zeal to Valentine is cold ,
And that I love him not as I was wont :
O ! but I love his lady too-too much ;
And that's the reason I love him so little .
How shall I dote on her with more advice ,
That thus without advice begin to love her ?
'Tis but her picture I have yet beheld ,
And that hath dazzled my reason's light ;
But when I look on her perfections ,
There is no reason but I shall be blind .
If I can check my erring love , I will ;
If not , to compass her I'll use my skill .


Launce ! by mine honesty , welcome to Milan !

Forswear not thyself , sweet youth , for I am not welcome . I reckon this always that a man is never undone till he be hanged ; nor never welcome to a place till some certain shot be paid and the hostess say , 'Welcome !' 

Come on , you madcap , I'll to the alehouse with you presently ; where , for one shot of five pence , thou shalt have five thousand welcomes . But , sirrah , how did thy master part with Madam Julia ?

Marry , after they closed in earnest , they parted very fairly in jest .

But shall she marry him ?

No .

How then ? Shall he marry her ?

No , neither .

What , are they broken ?

No , they are both as whole as a fish .

Why then , how stands the matter with them ?

Marry , thus ; when it stands well with him , it stands well with her .

What an ass art thou ! I understand thee not .

What a block art thou , that thou canst not ! My staff understands me .

What thou sayest ?

Ay , and what I do too : look thee , I'll but lean , and my staff understands me .

It stands under thee , indeed .

Why , stand-under and under-stand is all one .

But tell me true , will't be a match ?

Ask my dog : if he say ay , it will ; if he say no , it will ; if he shake his tail and say nothing , it will .

The conclusion is , then , that it will .

Thou shalt never get such a secret from me but by a parable .

'Tis well that I get it so . But , Launce , how sayest thou , that my master is become a notable lover ?

I never knew him otherwise .

Than how ?

A notable lubber , as thou reportest him to be .

Why , thou whoreson ass , thou mistakest me .

Why , fool , I meant not thee ; I meant thy master .

I tell thee , my master is become a hot lover .

Why , I tell thee , I care not though he burn himself in love . If thou wilt go with me to the alehouse so ; if not , thou art a Hebrew , a Jew , and not worth the name of a Christian .

Why ?

Because thou hast not so much charity in thee as to go to the ale with a Christian . Wilt thou go ?

At thy service .


To leave my Julia , shall I be forsworn ;
To love fair Silvia , shall I be forsworn ;
To wrong my friend , I shall be much forsworn ;
And even that power which gave me first my oath 
Provokes me to this threefold perjury :
Love bade me swear , and Love bids me forswear .
O sweet-suggesting Love ! if thou hast sinn'd ,
Teach me , thy tempted subject , to excuse it .
At first I did adore a twinkling star ,
But now I worship a celestial sun .
Unheedful vows may heedfully be broken ;
And he wants wit that wants resolved will 
To learn his wit to exchange the bad for better .
Fie , fie , unreverend tongue ! to call her bad ,
Whose sovereignty so oft thou hast preferr'd 
With twenty thousand soul-confirming oaths .
I cannot leave to love , and yet I do ;
But there I leave to love where I should love .
Julia I lose and Valentine I lose :
If I keep them , I needs must lose myself ;
If I lose them , thus find I by their loss ,
For Valentine , myself ; for Julia , Silvia .
I to myself am dearer than a friend ,
For love is still most precious in itself ;
And Silvia witness heaven that made her fair !
Shows Julia but a swarthy Ethiope .
I will forget that Julia is alive ,
Remembering that my love to her is dead ;
And Valentine I'll hold an enemy ,
Aiming at Silvia as a sweeter friend .
I cannot now prove constant to myself 
Without some treachery us'd to Valentine :
This night he meaneth with a corded ladder 
To climb celestial Silvia's chamber-window ,
Myself in counsel , his competitor .
Now presently , I'll give her father notice 
Of their disguising and pretended flight ;
Who , all enrag'd , will banish Valentine ;
For Thurio , he intends , shall wed his daughter ;
But , Valentine being gone , I'll quickly cross ,
By some sly trick blunt Thurio's dull proceeding .
Love , lend me wings to make my purpose swift ,
As thou hast lent me wit to plot this drift !


Counsel , Lucetta ; gentle girl , assist me :
And e'en in kind love I do conjure thee ,
Who art the table wherein all my thoughts 
Are visibly character'd and engrav'd ,
To lesson me and tell me some good mean 
How , with my honour , I may undertake 
A journey to my loving Proteus .

Alas ! the way is wearisome and long .

A true-devoted pilgrim is not weary 
To measure kingdoms with his feeble steps ;
Much less shall she that hath Love's wings to fly ,
And when the flight is made to one so dear ,
Of such divine perfection , as Sir Proteus .

Better forbear till Proteus make return .

O ! know'st thou not his looks are my soul's food ?
Pity the dearth that I have pined in ,
By longing for that food so long a time .
Didst thou but know the inly touch of love ,
Thou wouldst as soon go kindle fire with snow 
As seek to quench the fire of love with words .

I do not seek to quench your love's hot fire ,
But qualify the fire's extreme rage ,
Lest it should burn above the bounds of reason .

The more thou damm'st it up , the more it burns .
The current that with gentle murmur glides ,
Thou know'st , being stopp'd , impatiently doth rage ;
But when his fair course is not hindered ,
He makes sweet music with th' enamell'd stones ,
Giving a gentle kiss to every sedge 
He overtaketh in his pilgrimage ;
And so by many winding nooks he strays 
With willing sport , to the wild ocean .
Then let me go and hinder not my course :
I'll be as patient as a gentle stream 
And make a pastime of each weary step ,
Till the last step have brought me to my love ;
And there I'll rest , as after much turmoil 
A blessed soul doth in Elysium .

But in what habit will you go along ?

Not like a woman ; for I would prevent 
The loose encounters of lascivious men .
Gentle Lucetta , fit me with such weeds 
As may beseem some well-reputed page .

Why , then , your ladyship must cut your hair .

No , girl ; I'll knit it up in silken strings 
With twenty odd-conceited true-love knots :
To be fantastic may become a youth 
Of greater time than I shall show to be .

What fashion , madam , shall I make your breeches ?

That fits as well as 'Tell me , good my lord ,
What compass will you wear your farthingale ?' 
Why , even what fashion thou best lik'st , Lucetta .

You must needs have them with a cod-piece , madam .

Out , out , Lucetta ! that will be ill-favour'd .

A round hose , madam , now's not worth a pin ,
Unless you have a cod-piece to stick pins on .

Lucetta , as thou lov'st me , let me have 
What thou think'st meet and is most mannerly .
But tell me , wench , how will the world repute me 
For undertaking so unstaid a journey ?
I fear me , it will make me scandaliz'd .

If you think so , then stay at home and go not .

Nay , that I will not .

Then never dream on infamy , but go .
If Proteus like your journey when you come ,
No matter who's displeas'd when you are gone .
I fear me , he will scarce be pleas'd withal .

That is the least , Lucetta , of my fear :
A thousand oaths , an ocean of his tears ,
And instances of infinite of love 
Warrant me welcome to my Proteus .

All these are servants to deceitful men .

Base men , that use them to so base effect ;
But truer stars did govern Proteus' birth :
His words are bonds , his oaths are oracles ,
His love sincere , his thoughts immaculate ,
His tears pure messengers sent from his heart ,
His heart as far from fraud as heaven from earth .

Pray heaven he prove so when you come to him !

Now , as thou lov'st me , do him not that wrong 
To bear a hard opinion of his truth :
Only deserve my love by loving him ,
And presently go with me to my chamber ,
To take a note of what I stand in need of 
To furnish me upon my longing journey .
All that is mine I leave at thy dispose ,
My goods , my lands , my reputation ;
Only , in lieu thereof , dispatch me hence .
Come , answer not , but to it presently !
I am impatient of my tarriance .

Sir Thurio , give us leave , I pray , awhile ;
We have some secrets to confer about .

Now tell me , Proteus , what's your will with me ?

My gracious lord , that which I would discover 
The law of friendship bids me to conceal ;
But when I call to mind your gracious favours 
Done to me , undeserving as I am ,
My duty pricks me on to utter that 
Which else no worldly good should draw from me .
Know , worthy prince , Sir Valentine , my friend ,
This night intends to steal away your daughter :
Myself am one made privy to the plot .
I know you have determin'd to bestow her 
On Thurio , whom your gentle daughter hates ;
And should she thus be stol'n away from you 
It would be much vexation to your age .
Thus , for my duty's sake , I rather chose 
To cross my friend in his intended drift ,
Than , by concealing it , heap on your head 
A pack of sorrows which would press you down ,
Being unprevented , to your timeless grave .

Proteus , I thank thee for thine honest care ,
Which to requite , command me while I live .
This love of theirs myself have often seen ,
Haply , when they have judg'd me fast asleep ,
And oftentimes have purpos'd to forbid 
Sir Valentine her company and my court ;
But fearing lest my jealous aim might err 
And so unworthily disgrace the man ,
A rashness that I ever yet have shunn'd ,
I gave him gentle looks , thereby to find 
That which thyself hast now disclos'd to me .
And , that thou mayst perceive my fear of this ,
Knowing that tender youth is soon suggested ,
I nightly lodge her in an upper tower ,
The key whereof myself have ever kept ;
And thence she cannot be convey'd away .

Know , noble lord , they have devis'd a mean 
How he her chamber-window will ascend 
And with a corded ladder fetch her down ;
For which the youthful lover now is gone 
And this way comes he with it presently ;
Where , if it please you , you may intercept him .
But , good my lord , do it so cunningly 
That my discovery be not aimed at ;
For love of you , not hate unto my friend ,
Hath made me publisher of this pretence .

Upon mine honour , he shall never know 
That I had any light from thee of this .

Adieu , my lord : Sir Valentine is coming .

Sir Valentine , whither away so fast ?

Please it your Grace , there is a messenger 
That stays to bear my letters to my friends ,
And I am going to deliver them .

Be they of much import ?

The tenour of them doth but signify 
My health and happy being at your court .

Nay then , no matter : stay with me awhile ;
I am to break with thee of some affairs 
That touch me near , wherein thou must be secret .
'Tis not unknown to thee that I have sought 
To match my friend Sir Thurio to my daughter .

I know it well , my lord ; and sure , the match 
Were rich and honourable ; besides , the gentleman 
Is full of virtue , bounty , worth , and qualities 
Beseeming such a wife as your fair daughter .
Cannot your Grace win her to fancy him ?

No , trust me : she is peevish , sullen , froward ,
Proud , disobedient , stubborn , lacking duty ;
Neither regarding that she is my child ,
Nor fearing me as if I were her father :
And , may I say to thee this pride of hers ,
Upon advice , hath drawn my love from her ;
And , where I thought the remnant of mine age 
Should have been cherish'd by her child-like duty ,
I now am full resolv'd to take a wife 
And turn her out to who will take her in :
Then let her beauty be her wedding-dower ;
For me and my possessions she esteems not .

What would your Grace have me to do in this ?

There is a lady of Verona here ,
Whom I affect ; but she is nice and coy 
And nought esteems my aged eloquence :
Now therefore , would I have thee to my tutor ,
For long agone I have forgot to court ;
Besides , the fashion of the time is chang'd ,
How and which way I may bestow myself 
To be regarded in her sun-bright eye .

Win her with gifts , if she respect not words :
Dumb jewels often in their silent kind 
More than quick words do move a woman's mind .

But she did scorn a present that I sent her .

A woman sometime scorns what best contents her .
Send her another ; never give her o'er ,
For scorn at first makes after-love the more .
If she do frown , 'tis not in hate of you ,
But rather to beget more love in you ;
If she do chide , 'tis not to have you gone ;
For why the fools are mad if left alone .
Take no repulse , whatever she doth say ;
For , 'get you gone ,' she doth not mean , 'away !' 
Flatter and praise , commend , extol their graces ;
Though ne'er so black , say they have angels' faces .
That man that hath a tongue , I say , is no man ,
If with his tongue he cannot win a woman .

But she I mean is promis'd by her friends 
Unto a youthful gentleman of worth ,
And kept severely from resort of men ,
That no man hath access by day to her .

Why then , I would resort to her by night .

Ay , but the doors be lock'd and keys kept safe ,
That no man hath recourse to her by night .

What lets but one may enter at her window ?

Her chamber is aloft , far from the ground ,
And built so shelving that one cannot climb it 
Without apparent hazard of his life .

Why then , a ladder quaintly made of cords ,
To cast up , with a pair of anchoring hooks ,
Would serve to scale another Hero's tower ,
So bold Leander would adventure it .

Now , as thou art a gentleman of blood ,
Advise me where I may have such a ladder .

When would you use it ? pray , sir , tell me that .

This very night ; for Love is like a child ,
That longs for every thing that he can come by .

By seven o'clock I'll get you such a ladder .

But hark thee ; I will go to her alone :
How shall I best convey the ladder thither ?

It will be light , my lord , that you may bear it 
Under a cloak that is of any length .

A cloak as long as thine will serve the turn ?

Ay , my good lord .

Then let me see thy cloak :
I'll get me one of such another length .

Why , any cloak will serve the turn , my lord .

How shall I fashion me to wear a cloak ?
I pray thee , let me feel thy cloak upon me .

What letter is this same ? What's here ?To Silvia !
And here an engine fit for my proceeding !
I'll be so bold to break the seal for once .

My thoughts do harbour with my Silvia nightly ;
And slaves they are to me that send them flying 
O ! could their master come and go as lightly ,
Himself would lodge where senseless they are lying !
My herald thoughts in thy pure bosom rest them ;
While I , their king , that thither them importune ,
Do curse the grace that with such grace hath bless'd them ,
Because myself do want my servants' fortune :
I curse myself , for they are sent by me ,
That they should harbour where their lord would be .

What's here ?

Silvia , this night I will enfranchise thee 

'Tis so ; and here's the ladder for the purpose .
Why , Phaethon ,for thou art Merops' son ,
Wilt thou aspire to guide the heavenly car 
And with thy daring folly burn the world ?
Wilt thou reach stars , because they shine on thee ?
Go , basc intruder ! overweening slave !
Bestow thy fawning smiles on equal mates ,
And think my patience , more than thy desert ,
Is privilege for thy departure hence .
Thank me for this more than for all the favours 
Which all too much I have bestow'd on thee .
But if thou linger in my territories 
Longer than swiftest expedition 
Will give thee time to leave our royal court ,
By heaven ! my wrath shall far exceed the love 
I ever borc my daughter or thyself .
Be gone ! I will not hear thy vain excuse ;
But , as thou lov'st thy life , make speed from hence .


And why not death rather than living torment ?
To die is to be banish'd from myself ;
And Silvia is myself : banish'd from her 
Is self from self ,a deadly banishment !
What light is light , if Silvia be not seen ?
What joy is joy , if Silvia be not by ?
Unless it be to think that she is by 
And feed upon the shadow of perfection .
Except I be by Silvia in the night ,
There is no music in the nightingale ;
Unless I look on Silvia in the day ,
There is no day for me to look upon .
She is my essence ; and I leave to be ,
If I be not by her fair influence 
Foster'd , illumin'd , cherish'd , kept alive .
I fly not death , to fly his deadly doom :
Tarry I here , I but attend on death ;
But , fly I hence , I fly away from life .


Run , boy ; run , run , and seek him out .

Soho ! soho !

What seest thou ?

Him we go to find : there's not a hair on's head but 'tis a Valentine .

Valentine ?

No .

Who then ? his spirit ?

Neither .

What then ?

Nothing .

Can nothing speak ? Master , shall I strike ?

Who would'st thou strike ?

Nothing .

Villain , forbear .

Why , sir , I'll strike nothing : I pray you ,

Sirrah , I say , forbear .Friend Valentine , a word .

My ears are stopp'd and cannot hear good news ,
So much of bad already hath possess'd them .

Then in dumb silence will I bury mine ,
For they are harsh , untuneable and bad .

Is Silvia dead ?

No , Valentine .

No Valentine , indeed , for sacred Silvia !
Hath she forsworn me ?

No , Valentine .

No Valentine , if Silvia have forsworn me !
What is your news ?

Sir , there is a proclamation that you are vanished .

That thou art banished , O , that's the news ,
From hence , from Silvia , and from me thy friend .

O , I have fed upon this woe already ,
And now excess of it will make me surfeit .
Doth Silvia know that I am banished ?

Ay , ay ; and she hath offer'd to the doom 
Which , unrevers'd , stands in effectual force 
A sea of melting pearl , which some call tears :
Those at her father's churlish feet she tender'd ;
With them , upon her knees , her humble self ;
Wringing her hands , whose whiteness so became them 
As if but now they waxed pale for woe :
But neither bended knees , pure hands held up ,
Sad sighs , deep groans , nor silver-shedding tears ,
Could penetrate her uncompassionate sire ;
But Valentine , if he be ta'en , must die .
Besides , her intercession chaf'd him so ,
When she for thy repeal was suppliant ,
That to close prison he commanded her ,
With many bitter threats of biding there .

No more ; unless the next word that thou speak'st 
Have some malignant power upon my life :
If so , I pray thee , breathe it in mine ear ,
As ending anthem of my endless dolour .

Cease to lament for that thou canst not help ,
And study help for that which thou lament'st .
Time is the nurse and breeder of all good .
Here if thou stay , thou canst not see thy love ;
Besides , thy staying will abridge thy life .
Hope is a lover's staff ; walk hence with that 
And manage it against despairing thoughts .
Thy letters may be here , though thou art hence ;
Which , being writ to me , shall be deliver'd 
Even in the milk-white bosom of thy love .
The time now serves not to expostulate :
Come , I'll convey thee through the city-gate ,
And , ere I part with thee , confer at large 
Of all that may concern thy love-affairs .
As thou lov'st Silvia , though not for thyself ,
Regard thy danger , and along with me !

I pray thee , Launce , and if thou seest my boy ,
Bid him make haste and meet me at the North-gate .

Go , sirrah , find him out . Come , Valentine .

O my dear Silvia ! hapless Valentine !


I am but a fool , look you ; and yet I have the wit to think my master is a kind of a knave : but that's all one , if he be but one knave . He lives not now that knows me to be in love : yet I am in love ; but a team of horse shall not pluck that from me , nor who 'tis I love ; and yet 'tis a woman ; but what woman , I will not tell myself ; and yet 'tis a milkmaid ; yet 'tis not a maid , for she hath had gossips ; yet 'tis a maid , for she is her master's maid , and serves for wages . She hath more qualities than a water-spaniel ,which is much in a bare Christian .

Here is the catelog of her condition . Imprimis , She can fetch and carry . Why , a horse can do no more : nay , a horse cannot fetch , but only carry ; therefore , is she better than a jade . Item , She can milk ; look you , a sweet virtue in a maid with clean hands .


How now , Signior Launce ! what news with your mastership ?

With my master's ship ? why , it is at sea .

Well , your old vice still ; mistake the word . What news , then , in your paper ?

The blackest news that ever thou heardest .

Why , man , how black ?

Why , as black as ink .

Let me read them .

Fie on thee , jolthead ! thou canst not read .

Thou liest ; I can .

I will try thee . Tell me this : who begot thee ?

Marry , the son of my grandfather .

O , illiterate loiterer ! it was the son of thy grandmother . This proves that thou canst not read .

Come , fool , come : try me in thy paper .

There ; and Saint Nicholas be thy speed !

Imprimis , She can milk .

Ay , that she can .

Item , She brews good ale .

And thereof comes the proverb , 'Blessing of your heart , you brew good ale .' 

Item , She can sew .

That's as much as to say , Can she so ?

Item , She can knit .

What need a man care for a stock with a wench , when she can knit him a stock ?

Item , She can wash and scour .

A special virtue ; for then she need not be washed and scoured .

Item , She can spin .

Then may I set the world on wheels , when she can spin for her living .

Item , She hath many nameless virtues .

That's as much as to say , bastard virtues ; that , indeed , know not their fathers , and therefore have no names .

Here follow her vices .

Close at the heels of her virtues .

Item , She is not to be kissed fasting , in respect of her breath .

Well , that fault may be mended with a breakfast . Read on .

Item , She hath a sweet mouth .

That makes amends for her sour breath .

Item , She doth talk in her sleep .

It's no matter for that , so she sleep not in her talk .

Item , She is slow in words .

O villain , that set this down among her vices ! To be slow in words is a woman's only virtue : I pray thee , out with't , and place it for her chief virtue .

Item , She is proud .

Out with that too : it was Eve's legacy , and cannot be ta'en from her .

Item , She hath no teeth .

I care not for that neither , because I love crusts .

Item , She is curst .

Well ; the best is , she hath no teeth to bite .

Item , She will often praise her liquor .

If her liquor be good , she shall : if she will not , I will ; for good things should be praised .

Item , She is too liberal .

Of her tongue she cannot , for that's writ down she is slow of : of her purse she shall not , for that I'll keep shut : now , of another thing she may , and that cannot I help . Well , proceed .

Item , She hath more hair than wit , and more faults than hairs , and more wealth than faults .

Stop there ; I'll have her : she was mine , and not mine , twice or thrice in that last article . Rehearse that once more .

Item , She hath more hair than wit .

More hair than wit it may be ; I'll prove it : the cover of the salt hides the salt , and therefore it is more than the salt ; the hair , that covers the wit is more than the wit , for the greater hides the less . What's next ?

And more faults than hairs .

That's monstrous ! O , that that were out !

And more wealth than faults .

Why , that word makes the faults gracious . Well , I'll have her ; and if it be a match , as nothing is impossible ,

What then ?

Why , then will I tell thee ,that thy master stays for thee at the North-gate .

For me ?

For thee ! ay ; who art thou ? he hath stayed for a better man than thee .

And must I go to him ?

Thou must run to him , for thou hast stayed so long that going will scarce serve the turn .

Why didst not tell me sooner ? pox of your love-letters !


Now will he be swing'd for reading my letter . An unmannerly slave , that will thrust himself into secrets . I'll after , to rejoice in the boy's correction .


Sir Thurio , fear not but that she will love you ,
Now Valentine is banish'd from her sight .

Since his exile she hath despis'd me most ,
Forsworn my company and rail'd at me ,
That I am desperate of obtaining her .

This weak impress of love is as a figure 
Trenched in ice , which with an hour's heat 
Dissolves to water and doth lose his form .
A little time will melt her frozen thoughts ,
And worthless Valentine shall be forgot .


How now , Sir Proteus ! Is your countryman 

According to our proclamation gone ?

Gone , my good lord .

My daughter takes his going grievously .

A little time , my lord , will kill that grief .

So I believe ; but Thurio thinks not so .
Proteus , the good conceit I hold of thee ,
For thou hast shown some sign of good desert ,
Makes me the better to confer with thee .

Longer than I prove loyal to your Grace 
Let me not live to look upon your Grace .

Thou know'st how willingly I would effect 
The match between Sir Thurio and my daughter .

I do , my lord .

And also , I think , thou art not ignorant 
How she opposes her against my will .

She did , my lord , when Valentine was here .

Ay , and perversely she persevers so .
What might we do to make the girl forget 
The love of Valentine , and love Sir Thurio ?

The best way is to slander Valentine 
With falsehood , cowardice , and poor descent ,
Three things that women highly hold in hate .

Ay , but she'll think that it is spoke in hate .

Ay , if his enemy deliver it :
Therefore it must with circumstance be spoken 
By one whom she esteemeth as his friend .

Then you must undertake to slander him .

And that , my lord , I shall be loath to do :
'Tis an ill office for a gentleman ,
Especially against his very friend .

Where your good word cannot advantage him ,
Your slander never can endamage him :
Therefore the office is indifferent ,
Being entreated to it by your friend .

You have prevail'd , my lord . If I can do it ,
By aught that I can speak in his dispraise ,
She shall not long continue love to him .
But say this weed her love from Valentine ,
It follows not that she will love Sir Thurio .

Therefore , as you unwind her love from him ,
Lest it should ravel and be good to none ,
You must provide to bottom it on me ;
Which must be done by praising me as much 
As you in worth dispraise Sir Valentine .

And , Proteus , we dare trust you in this kind ,
Because we know , on Valentine's report ,
You are already Love's firm votary 
And cannot soon revolt and change your mind .
Upon this warrant shall you have access 
Where you with Silvia may confer at large ;
For she is lumpish , heavy , melancholy ,
And , for your friend's sake , will be glad of you ;
Where you may temper her , by your persuasion 
To hate young Valentine and love my friend .

As much as I can do I will effect .
But you , Sir Thurio , are not sharp enough ;
You must lay lime to tangle her desires 
By wailful sonnets , whose composed rimes 
Should be full-fraught with serviceable vows .

Ay ,
Much is the force of heaven-bred poesy .

Say that upon the altar of her beauty 
You sacrifice your tears , your sighs , your heart .
Write till your ink be dry , and with your tears 
Moist it again , and frame some feeling line 
That may discover such integrity :
For Orpheus' lute was strung with poets' sinews ,
Whose golden touch could soften steel and stones ,
Make tigers tame and huge leviathans 
Forsake unsounded deeps to dance on sands .
After your dire-lamenting elegies ,
Visit by night your lady's chamber-window 
With some sweet consort : to their instruments 
Tune a deploring dump ; the night's dead silence 
Will well become such sweet-complaining grievance .
This , or else nothing , will inherit her .

This discipline shows thou hast been in love .

And thy advice this night I'll put in practice .
Therefore , sweet Proteus , my direction-giver ,
Let us into the city presently 
To sort some gentlemen well skill'd in music .
I have a sonnet that will serve the turn 
To give the onset to thy good advice .

About it , gentlemen !

We'll wait upon your grace till aftersupper ,
And afterward determine our proceedings .

Even now about it ! I will pardon you .

Fellows , stand fast ; I see a passenger .

If there be ten , shrink not , but down with 'em .


Stand , sir , and throw us that you have about ye ;
If not , we'll make you sit and rifle you .

Sir , we are undone : these are the villains 
That all the travellers do fear so much .

My friends ,

That's not so , sir ; we are your enemies .

Peace ! we'll hear him .

Ay , by my beard , will we , for he is a proper man .

Then know , that I have little wealth to lose .
A man I am cross'd with adversity :
My riches are these poor habiliments ,
Of which if you should here disfurnish me ,
You take the sum and substance that I have .

Whither travel you ?

To Verona .

Whence came you ?

From Milan .

Have you long sojourn'd there ?

Some sixteen months ; and longer might have stay'd 
If crooked fortune had not thwarted me .

What ! were you banish'd thence ?

I was .

For what offence ?

For that which now torments me to rehearse .
I kill'd a man , whose death I much repent ;
But yet I slew him manfully , in fight ,
Without false vantage or base treachery .

Why , ne'er repent it , if it were done so .
But were you banish'd for so small a fault ?

I was , and held me glad of such a doom .

Have you the tongues ?

My youthful travel therein made me happy ,
Or else I often had been miserable .

By the bare scalp of Robin Hood's fat friar ,
This fellow were a king for our wild faction !

We'll have him : Sirs , a word .

Master , be one of them ;
It is an honourable kind of thievery .

Peace , villain !

Tell us this : have you anything to take to ?

Nothing , but my fortune .

Know then , that some of us are gentlemen ,
Such as the fury of ungovern'd youth 
Thrust from the company of awful men :
Myself was from Verona banished 
For practising to steal away a lady ,
An heir , and near allied unto the duke .

And I from Mantua , for a gentleman ,
Who , in my mood , I stabb'd unto the heart .

And I for such like petty crimes as these .
But to the purpose ; for we cite our faults ,
That they may hold excus'd our lawless lives ;
And , partly , seeing you are beautified 
With goodly shape , and by your own report 
A linguist , and a man of such perfection 
As we do in our quality much want 

Indeed , because you are a banish'd man ,
Therefore , above the rest , we parley to you .
Are you content to be our general ?
To make a virtue of necessity 
And live , as we do , in this wilderness ?

What say'st thou ? wilt thou be of our consort ?
Say 'ay ,' and be the captain of us all :
We'll do thee homage and be rul'd by thee ,
Love thee as our commander and our king .

But if thou scorn our courtesy , thou diest .

Thou shalt not live to brag what we have offer'd .

I take your offer and will live with you ,
Provided that you do no outrages 
On silly women , or poor passengers .

No ; we detest such vile , base practices .
Come , go with us ; we'll bring thee to our crews ,
And show thee all the treasure we have got ,
Which , with ourselves , all rest at thy dispose .


Already have I been false to Valentine ,
And now I must be as unjust to Thurio .
Under the colour of commending him ,
I have access my own love to prefer :
But Silvia is too fair , too true , too holy ,
To be corrupted with my worthless gifts .
When I protest true loyalty to her ,
She twits me with my falsehood to my friend ;
When to her beauty I commend my vows ,
She bids me think how I have been forsworn 
In breaking faith with Julia whom I lov'd :
And notwithstanding all her sudden quips ,
The least whereof would quell a lover's hope ,
Yet , spaniel-like , the more she spurns my love ,
The more it grows , and fawneth on her still .
But here comes Thurio : now must we to her window ,
And give some evening music to her ear .


How now , Sir Proteus ! are you crept before us ?

Ay , gentle Thurio ; for you know that love 
Will creep in service where it cannot go .

Ay ; but I hope , sir , that you love not here .

Sir , but I do ; or else I would be hence .

Who ? Silvia ?

Ay , Silvia , for your sake .

I thank you for your own . Now , gentlemen ,
Let's tune , and to it lustily a while .


Now , my young guest , methinks you're allycholly : I pray you , why is it ?

Marry , mine host , because I cannot be merry .

Come , we'll have you merry . I'll bring you where you shall hear music and see the gentleman that you asked for .

But shall I hear him speak ?

Ay , that you shall .

That will be music .


Hark ! hark !

Is he among these ?

Ay ; but peace ! let's hear 'em .


Who is Silvia ? what is she ?
That all our swains commend her ?
Holy , fair , and wise is she ;
The heaven such grace did lend her ,
That she might admired be .
Is she kind as she is fair ?
For beauty lives with kindness :
Love doth to her eyes repair ,
To help him of his blindness ;
And , being help'd , inhabits there .
Then to Silvia let us sing ,
That Silvia is excelling ;
She excels each mortal thing 
Upon the dull earth dwelling ;
To her let us garlands bring .

How now ! are you sadder than you were before ? How do you , man ? the music likes you not .

You mistake ; the musician likes me not .

Why , my pretty youth ?

He plays false , father .

How ? out of tune on the strings ?

Not so ; but yet so false that he grieves my very heart-strings .

You have a quick ear .

Ay ; I would I were deaf ; it makes me have a slow heart .

I perceive you delight not in music .

Not a whit ,when it jars so .

Hark ! what fine change is in the music !

Ay , that change is the spite .

You would have them always play but one thing ?

I would always have one play but one thing .
But , host , doth this Sir Proteus that we talk on 
Often resort unto this gentlewoman ?

I will tell you what Launce , his man , told me : he lov'd her out of all nick .

Where is Launce ?

Gone to seek his dog ; which , to-morrow , by his master's command , he must carry for a present to his lady .

Peace ! stand aside : the company parts .

Sir Thurio , fear not you : I will so plead 
That you shall say my cunning drift excels .

Where meet we ?

At Saint Gregory's well .

Farewell .

Madam , good even to your ladyship .

I thank you for your music , gentlemen .
Who is that that spake ?

One , lady , if you knew his pure heart's truth ,
You would quickly learn to know him by his voice .

Sir Proteus , as I take it .

Sir Proteus , gentle lady , and your servant .

What is your will ?

That I may compass yours .

You have your wish ; my will is even this :
That presently you hie you home to bed .
Thou subtle , perjur'd , false , disloyal man !
Think'st thou I am so shallow , so conceitless ,
To be seduced by thy flattery ,
That hast deceiv'd so many with thy vows ?
Return , return , and make thy love amends .
For me , by this pale queen of night I swear ,
I am so far from granting thy request 
That I despise thee for thy wrongful suit ,
And by and by intend to chide myself 
Even for this time I spend in talking to thee .

I grant , sweet love , that I did love a lady ;
But she is dead .

'Tware false , if I should speak it ;
For I am sure she is not buried .

Say that she be ; yet Valentine thy friend 
Survives ; to whom , thyself art witness 
I am betroth'd : and art thou not asham'd 
To wrong him with thy importunacy ?

I likewise hear that Valentine is dead .

And so suppose am I ; for in his grave , Assure thyself my love is buried .

Sweet lady , let me rake it from the earth .

Go to thy lady's grave and call hers thence ;
Or , at the least , in hers sepulchre thine .

He heard not that .

Madam , if your heart be so obdurate ,
Vouchsafe me yet your picture for my love ,
The picture that is hanging in your chamber :
To that I'll speak , to that I'll sigh and weep ;
For since the substance of your perfect self 
Is else devoted , I am but a shadow ,
And to your shadow will I make true love .

If 'twere a substance , you would , sure , deceive it ,
And make it but a shadow , as I am .

I am very loath to be your idol , sir ;
But , since your falsehood shall become you well 
To worship shadows and adore false shapes ,
Send to me in the morning and I'll send it .
And so , good rest .

As wretches have o'er night 
That wait for execution in the morn .


Host , will you go ?

By my halidom , I was fast asleep .

Pray you , where lies Sir Proteus ?

Marry , at my house . Trust me , I think 'tis almost day .

Not so ; but it hath been the longest night 
That e'er I watch'd and the most heaviest .


This is the hour that Madam Silvia 
Entreated me to call , and know her mind :
There's some great matter she'd employ me in .
Madam , Madam !


Who calls ?

Your servant , and your friend ;
One that attends your ladyship's command .

Sir Eglamour , a thousand times good morrow .

As many , worthy lady , to yourself .
According to your ladyship's impose ,
I am thus early come to know what service 
It is your pleasure to command me in .

O Eglamour , thou art a gentleman 
Think not I flatter , for I swear I do not 
Valiant , wise , remorseful , well-accomplish'd .
Thou art not ignorant what dear good will 
I bear unto the banish'd Valentine ,
Nor how my father would enforce me marry 
Vain Thurio , whom my very soul abhors .
Thyself hast lov'd ; and I have heard thee say 
No grief did ever come so near thy heart 
As when thy lady and thy true love died ,
Upon whose grave thou vow'dst pure chastity .
Sir Eglamour , I would to Valentine ,
To Mantua , where , I hear he makes abode ;
And , for the ways are dangerous to pass ,
I do desire thy worthy company ,
Upon whose faith and honour I repose .
Urge not my father's anger , Eglamour ,
But think upon my grief , a lady's grief ,
And on the justice of my flying hence ,
To keep me from a most unholy match ,
Which heaven and fortune still rewards with plagues .
I do desire thee , even from a heart 
As full of sorrows as the sea of sands ,
To bear me company and go with me :
If not , to hide what I have said to thee ,
That I may venture to depart alone .

Madam , I pity much your grievances ;
Which since I know they virtuously are plac'd ,
I give consent to go along with you ,
Recking as little what betideth me 
As much I wish all good befortune you .
When will you go ?

This evening coming .

Where shall I meet you ?

At Friar Patrick's cell ,
Where I intend holy confession .

I will not fail your ladyship .
Good morrow , gentle lady .

Good morrow , kind Sir Eglamour .


When a man's servant shall play the cur with him , look you , it goes hard ; one that I brought up of a puppy ; one that I saved from drowning , when three or four of his blind brothers and sisters went to it . I have taught him , even as one would say precisely , 'Thus would I teach a dog .' I was sent to deliver him as a present to Mistress Silvia from my master , and I came no sooner into the dining-chamber but he steps me to her trencher and steals her capon's leg . O ! 'tis a foul thing when a cur cannot keep himself in all companies . I would have , as one should say , one that takes upon him to be a dog indeed , to be , as it were , a dog at all things . If I had not had more wit than he , to take a fault upon me that he did , I think verily he had been hanged for't : sure as I live , he had suffered for't : you shall judge . He thrusts me himself into the company of three or four gentleman-like dogs under the duke's table : he had not been there bless the mark a pissing-while , but all the chamber smelt him . 'Out with the dog !' says one ; 'What cur is that ?' says another ; 'Whip him out ,' says the third ; 'Hang him up ,' says the duke . I , having been acquainted with the smell before , knew it was Crab , and goes me to the fellow that whips the dogs : 'Friend ,' quoth I , 'you mean to whip the dog ?' 'Ay , marry , do I ,' quoth he . 'You do him the more wrong ,' quoth I ; ''twas I did the thing you wot of .' He makes me no more ado , but whips me out of the chamber . How many masters would do this for his servant ? Nay , I'll be sworn , I have sat in the stocks for puddings he hath stolen , otherwise he had been executed ; I have stood on the pillory for geese he hath killed , otherwise he had suffered for't ; thou thinkest not of this now . Nay , I remember the trick you served me when I took my leave of Madam Silvia : did not I bid thee still mark me and do as I do ? When didst thou see me heave up my leg and make water against a gentlewoman's farthingale ? Didst thou ever see me do such a trick ?


Sebastian is thy name ? I like thee well 
And will employ thee in some service presently .

In what you please : I will do what I can .

I hope thou wilt .

How now , you whoreson peasant !
Where have you been these two days loitering ?

Marry , sir , I carried Mistress Silvia the dog you bade me .

And what says she to my little jewel ?

Marry , she says , your dog was a cur , and tells you , currish thanks is good enough for such a present .

But she received my dog ?

No , indeed , did she not : here have I brought him back again .

What ! didst thou offer her this from me ?

Ay , sir : the other squirrel was stolen from me by the hangman boys in the marketplace ; and then I offered her mine own , who is a dog as big as ten of yours , and therefore the gift the greater .

Go , get thee hence , and find my dog again ,
Or ne'er return again into my sight .
Away , I say ! Stay'st thou to vex me here ?
A slave that still an end turns me to shame .

Sebastian , I have entertained thee 
Partly , that I have need of such a youth ,
That can with some discretion do my business ,
For't is no trusting to yond foolish lout ;
But chiefly for thy face and thy behaviour ,
Which , if my augury deceive me not ,
Witness good bringing up , fortune , and truth :
Therefore , know thou , for this I entertain thee .
Go presently , and take this ring with thee .
Deliver it to Madam Silvia :
She lov'd me well deliver'd it to me .

It seems , you lov'd not her , to leave her token .
She's dead , belike ?

Not so : I think , she lives .

Alas !

Why dost thou cry 'alas ?' 

I cannot choose 
But pity her .

Wherefore should'st thou pity her ?

Because methinks that she lov'd you as well 
As you do love your lady Silvia .
She dreams on him that has forgot her love ;
You dote on her , that cares not for your love .
'Tis pity , love should be so contrary ;
And thinking on it makes me cry , 'alas !' 

Well , well , give her that ring and therewithal 
This letter : that's her chamber . Tell my lady 
I claim the promise for her heavenly picture .
Your message done , hie home unto my chamber ,
Where thou shalt find me sad and solitary .


How many women would do such a message ?
Alas , poor Proteus ! thou hast entertain'd 
A fox to be the shepherd of thy lambs .
Alas , poor fool ! why do I pity him 
That with his very heart despiseth me ?
Because he loves her , he despiseth me ;
Because I love him , I must pity him .
This ring I gave him when he parted from me ,
To bind him to remember my good will ;
And now am I unhappy messenger 
To plead for that which I would not obtain ,
To carry that which I would have refus'd ,
To praise his faith which I would have disprais'd .
I am my master's true-confirmed love ,
But cannot be true servant to my master ,
Unless I prove false traitor to myself .
Yet will I woo for him ; but yet so coldly 
As heaven it knows , I would not have him speed .


Gentlewoman , good day ! I pray you , be my mean 

To bring me where to speak with Madam Silvia .

What would you with her , if that I be she ?

If you be she , I do entreat your patience To hear me speak the message I am sent on .

From whom ?

From my master , Sir Proteus , madam .

O ! he sends you for a picture ?

Ay , madam .

Ursula , bring my picture there .

Go , give your master this : tell him from me ,
One Julia , that his changing thoughts forget ,
Would better fit his chamber than this shadow .

Madam , please you peruse this letter .
Pardon me , madam , I have unadvis'd 
Deliver'd you a paper that I should not :
This is the letter to your ladyship .

I pray thee , let me look on that again .

It may not be : good madam , pardon me .

There , hold .
I will not look upon your master's lines :
I know , they are stuff'd with protestations 
And full of new-found oaths , which he will break 
As easily as I do tear his paper .

Madam , he sends your ladyship this ring .

The more shame for him that he sends it me ;
For , I have heard him say a thousand times ,
His Julia gave it him at his departure .
Though his false finger have profan'd the ring ,
Mine shall not do his Julia so much wrong .

She thanks you .

What say'st thou ?

I thank you , madam , that you tender her .
Poor gentlewoman ! my master wrongs her much .

Dost thou know her ?

Almost as well as I do know myself :
To think upon her woes , I do protest 
That I have wept a hundred several times .

Belike , she thinks , that Proteus hath forsook her .

I think she doth , and that's her cause of sorrow .

Is she not passing fair ?

She hath been fairer , madam , than she is .
When she did think my master lov'd her well ,
She , in my judgment , was as fair as you ;
But since she did neglect her looking-glass 
And threw her sun-expelling mask away ,
The air hath starv'd the roses in her cheeks 
And pinch'd the lily-tincture of her face ,
That now she is become as black as I .

How tall was she ?

About my stature ; for , at Pentecost ,
When all our pageants of delight were play'd ,
Our youth got me to play the woman's part ,
And I was trimm'd in Madam Julia's gown ,
Which served me as fit , by all men's judgments ,
As if the garment had been made for me :
Therefore I know she is about my height .
And at that time I made her weep agood ;
For I did play a lamentable part .
Madam , 'twas Ariadne passioning 
For Theseus' perjury and unjust flight ;
Which I so lively acted with my tears 
That my poor mistress , moved therewithal ,
Wept bitterly , and would I might be dead 
If I in thought felt not her very sorrow !

She is beholding to thee , gentle youth .
Alas , poor lady , desolate and left !
I weep myself to think upon thy words .
Here , youth , there is my purse : I give thee this 
For thy sweet mistress' sake , because thou lov'st her .
Farewell .

And she shall thank you for't , if e'er you know her .

A virtuous gentlewoman , mild and beautiful .
I hope my master's suit will be but cold ,
Since she respects my mistress' love so much .
Alas , how love can trifle with itself !
Here is her picture : let me see ; I think ,
If I had such a tire , this face of mine 
Were full as lovely as is this of hers ;
And yet the painter flatter'd her a little ,
Unless I flatter with myself too much .
Her hair is auburn , mine is perfect yellow :
If that be all the difference in his love 
I'll get me such a colour'd periwig .
Her eyes are grey as glass , and so are mine :
Ay , but her forehead's low , and mine's as high .
What should it be that he respects in her 
But I can make respective in myself ,
If this fond Love were not a blinded god ?
Come , shadow , come , and take this shadow up ,
For 'tis thy rival . O thou senseless form !
Thou shalt be worshipp'd , kiss'd , lov'd , and ador'd ,
And , were there sense in his idolatry ,
My substance should be statue in thy stead .
I'll use thee kindly for thy mistress' sake ,
That us'd me so ; or else , by Jove I vow ,
I should have scratch'd out your unseeing eyes ,
To make my master out of love with thee .

The sun begins to gild the western sky ,
And now it is about the very hour 
That Silvia at Friar Patrick's cell should meet me .
She will not fail ; for lovers break not hours ,
Unless it be to come before their time ,
So much they spur their expedition .
See , where she comes .

Lady , a happy evening !

Amen , amen ! go on , good Eglamour ,
Out at the postern by the abbey-wall .
I fear I am attended by some spies .

Fear not : the forest is not three leagues off ;
If we recover that , we're sure enough .


Sir Proteus , what says Silvia to my suit ?

O , sir , I find her milder than she was ;
And yet she takes exceptions at your person .

What ! that my leg is too long ?

No , that it is too little .

I'll wear a boot to make it somewhat rounder .

But love will not be spurr'd to what it loathes .

What says she to my face ?

She says it is a fair one .

Nay then , the wanton lies ; my face is black .

But pearls are fair , and the old saying is ,
'Black men are pearls in beauteous ladies' eyes .' 

'Tis true , such pearls as put out ladies' eyes ;
For I had rather wink than look on them .

How likes she my discourse ?

Ill , when you talk of war .

But well , when I discourse of love and peace ?

But better , indeed , when you hold your peace .

What says she to my valour ?

O , sir , she makes no doubt of that .

She needs not , when she knows it cowardice .

What says she to my birth ?

That you are well deriv'd .

True ; from a gentleman to a fool .

Considers she my possessions ?

O , ay ; and pities them .

Wherefore ?

That such an ass should owe them .

That they are out by lease .

Here comes the duke .


How now , Sir Proteus ! how now , Thurio !
Which of you saw Sir Eglamour of late ?

Not I .

Nor I .

Saw you my daughter ?

Neither .

Why then ,
She's fled unto that peasant Valentine ,
And Eglamour is in her company .
'Tis true ; for Friar Laurence met them both ,
As he in penance wander'd through the forest ;
Him he knew well , and guess'd that it was she ,
But , being mask'd , he was not sure of it ;
Besides , she did intend confession 
At Patrick's cell this even , and there she was not .
These likelihoods confirm her flight from hence .
Therefore , I pray you , stand not to discourse ,
But mount you presently and meet with me 
Upon the rising of the mountain-foot ,
That leads towards Mantua , whither they are fled .
Dispatch , sweet gentlemen , and follow me .


Why , this it is to be a peevish girl ,
That flies her fortune when it follows her .
I'll after , more to be reveng'd on Eglamour 
Than for the love of reckless Silvia .


And I will follow , more for Silvia's love 
Than hate of Eglamour that goes with her .


And I will follow , more to cross that love 
Than hate for Silvia that is gone for love .


Come , come ,
Be patient ; we must bring you to our captain .

A thousand more mischances than this one 
Have learn'd me how to brook this patiently .

Come , bring her away .

Where is the gentleman that was with her ?

Being nimble-footed , he hath outrun us ;
But Moyses and Valerius follow him .
Go thou with her to the west end of the wood ;
There is our captain . We'll follow him that's fled :
The thicket is beset ; he cannot 'scape .


Come , I must bring you to our captain's cave .
Fear not ; he bears an honourable mind ,
And will not use a woman lawlessly .

O Valentine ! this I endure for thee .


How use doth breed a habit in a man !
This shadowy desart , unfrequented woods ,
I better brook than flourishing peopled towns .
Here can I sit alone , unseen of any ,
And to the nightingale's complaining notes 
Tune my distresses and record my woes .
O thou that dost inhabit in my breast ,
Leave not the mansion so long tenantless ,
Lest , growing ruinous , the building fall 
And leave no memory of what it was !
Repair me with thy presence , Silvia !
Thou gentle nymph , cherish thy forlorn swain !

What halloing and what stir is this to-day ?
These are my mates , that make their wills their law ,
Have some unhappy passenger in chase .
They love me well ; yet I have much to do 
To keep them from uncivil outrages .
Withdraw thee , Valentine : who's this comes here ?

Madam , this service I have done for you 
Though you respect not aught your servant doth 
To hazard life and rescue you from him 
That would have forc'd your honour and your love .
Vouchsafe me , for my meed , but one fair look ;
A smaller boon than this I cannot beg ,
And less than this , I am sure , you cannot give .

How like a dream is this I see and hear !
Love , lend me patience to forbear awhile .

O , miserable , unhappy that I am !

Unhappy were you , madam , ere I came ;
But by my coming I have made you happy .

By thy approach thou mak'st me most unhappy .

And me , when he approacheth to your presence .

Had I been seized by a hungry lion ,
I would have been a breakfast to the beast ,
Rather than have false Proteus rescue me .
O ! heaven be judge how I love Valentine ,
Whose life's as tender to me as my soul ,
And full as much for more there cannot be 
I do detest false perjur'd Proteus .
Therefore be gone , solicit me no more .

What dangerous action , stood it next to death ,
Would I not undergo for one calm look !
O , 'tis the curse in love , and still approv'd ,
When women cannot love where they're belov'd !

When Proteus cannot love where he's belov'd .
Read over Julia's heart , thy first best love ,
For whose dear sake thou didst then rend thy faith 
Into a thousand oaths ; and all those oaths 
Descended into perjury to love me .
Thou hast no faith left now , unless thou'dst two ,
And that's far worse than none : better have none 
Than plural faith which is too much by one .
Thou counterfeit to thy true friend !

In love 
Who respects friend ?

All men but Proteus .

Nay , if the gentle spirit of moving words 
Can no way change you to a milder form ,
I'll woo you like a soldier , at arms' end ,
And love you 'gainst the nature of love ,force ye .

O heaven !

I'll force thee yield to my desire .

Ruffian , let go that rude uncivil touch ;
Thou friend of an ill fashion !

Valentine !

Thou common friend , that's without faith or love 
For such is a friend now treach'rous man !
Thou hast beguil'd my hopes : naught but mine eye 
Could have persuaded me . Now I dare not say 
I have one friend alive : thou wouldst disprove me .
Who should be trusted now , when one's right hand 
Is perjur'd to the bosom ? Proteus ,
I am sorry I must never trust thee more ,
But count the world a stranger for thy sake .
The private wound is deep'st . O time most curst !
'Mongst all foes that a friend should be the worst !

My shame and guilt confound me .
Forgive me , Valentine . If hearty sorrow 
Be a sufficient ransom for offence ,
I tender't here : I do as truly suffer 
As e'er I did commit .

Then , I am paid ;
And once again I do receive thee honest .
Who by repentance is not satisfied 
Is nor of heaven , nor earth ; for these are pleas'd .
By penitence the Eternal's wrath's appeas'd :
And , that my love may appear plain and free ,
All that was mine in Silvia I give thee .

O me unhappy !


Look to the boy .

Why , boy ! why , wag ! how now ! what's the matter ?
Look up ; speak .

O good sir , my master charg'd me 
To deliver a ring to Madam Silvia ,
Which out of my neglect was never done .

Where is that ring , boy ?

Here 'tis this is it .


How ! let me see .
Why this is the ring I gave to Julia .

O , cry you mercy , sir ; I have mistook :
This is the ring you sent to Silvia .


But how cam'st thou by this ring ?
At my depart I gave this unto Julia .

And Julia herself did give it me ;
And Julia herself hath brought it hither .

How ! Julia !

Behold her that gave aim to all thy oaths ,
And entertain'd them deeply in her heart :
How oft hast thou with perjury cleft the root !
O Proteus ! let this habit make thee blush .
Be thou asham'd that I have took upon me 
Such an immodest raiment ; if shame live 
In a disguise of love .
It is the lesser blot , modesty finds ,
Women to change their shapes than men their minds .

Than men their minds ! 'tis true . O heaven ! were man 
But constant , he were perfect : that one error 
Fills him with faults ; makes him run through all the sins :
Inconstancy falls off ere it begins .
What is in Silvia's face , but I may spy 
More fresh in Julia's with a constant eye ?

Come , come , a hand from either .
Let me be blest to make this happy close :
'Twere pity two such friends should be long foes .

Bear witness , heaven , I have my wish , for ever .

And I mine .


A prize ! a prize ! a prize !

Forbear , forbear , I say ; it is my lord the duke .
Your Grace is welcome to a man disgrac'd ,
Banished Valentine .

Sir Valentine !

Yonder is Silvia ; and Silvia's mine .

Thurio , give back , or else embrace thy death ;
Come not within the measure of my wrath ;
Do not name Silvia thine ; if once again ,
Verona shall not hold thee . Here she stands ;
Take but possession of her with a touch ;
I dare thee but to breathe upon my love .

Sir Valentine , I care not for her , I .
I hold him but a fool that will endanger 
His body for a girl that loves him not :
I claim her not , and therefore she is thine .

The more degenerate and base art thou ,
To make such means for her as thou hast done ,
And leave her on such slight conditions .
Now , by the honour of my ancestry ,
I do applaud thy spirit , Valentine ,
And think thee worthy of an empress' love .
Know then , I here forget all former griefs ,
Cancel all grudge , repeal thee home again ,
Plead a new state in thy unrivall'd merit ,
To which I thus subscribe : Sir Valentine ,
Thou art a gentleman and well deriv'd ;
Take thou thy Silvia , for thou hast deserv'd her .

I thank your Grace ; the gift hath made me happy .
I now beseech you , for your daughter's sake ,
To grant one boon that I shall ask of you .

I grant it , for thine own , whate'er it be .

These banish'd men , that I have kept withal 
Are men endu'd with worthy qualities :
Forgive them what they have committed here ,
And let them be recall'd from their exile .
They are reformed , civil , full of good ,
And fit for great employment , worthy lord .

Thou hast prevail'd ; I pardon them , and thee :
Dispose of them as thou know'st their deserts .
Come , let us go : we will include all jars 
With triumphs , mirth , and rare solemnity .

And as we walk along , I dare be bold 
With our discourse to make your Grace to smile .
What think you of this page , my lord ?

I think the boy hath grace in him : he blushes .

I warrant you , my lord , more grace than boy .

What mean you by that saying ?

Please you , I'll tell you as we pass along ,
That you will wonder what hath fortuned .
Come , Proteus ; 'tis your penance , but to hear 
The story of your loves discovered :
That done , our day of marriage shall be yours ;
One feast , one house , one mutual happiness .